Co-Parents: How to Draft a Holiday Plan That Works for Everyone 

For many co-parents, the holiday season brings a mix of joy and stress. You want to create special memories for your children, but dividing time fairly with your co-parent can be challenging. Having a clear, well-thought-out holiday plan is key to ensuring a smooth holiday season for everyone involved—especially your kids. Whether you’re planning for winter breaks, Christmas mornings, or family vacations, a tailored holiday parenting plan can make all the difference.

Here’s how you can draft a practical, stress-free holiday plan while maintaining a focus on your children’s happiness and well-being. 

Why Do You Need a Holiday Parenting Plan? 

Holidays hold a special place in a child’s heart, filled with traditions, family gatherings, and fun adventures. For co-parents, creating a parenting plan for the holidays isn’t just about dividing days—it’s about making sure your children feel loved and secure, no matter which parent they’re with. 

Without a clear plan, misunderstandings or conflicts can arise, potentially disrupting the holidays for your children. Drafting a plan ahead of time can help you and your co-parent prevent stress and focus on making the season magical for your children. 

How Does a Holiday Plan Fit Into Your Custody Agreement? 

One common question is whether a holiday schedule affects the rest of your parenting plan. Typically, holiday arrangements take precedence over your regular custody schedule. The plan is designed to ensure both parents get to share special moments with their children, even if it means deviating from the usual plan. 

It’s crucial to include your holiday schedule as part of your existing custody agreement. This provides clarity on how holidays will be shared and removes any uncertainty that could lead to disputes down the road. 

What Should a Holiday Parenting Plan Include? 

A comprehensive holiday parenting plan should address several aspects, including: 

• Specific Dates: Clearly outline which days and times are allocated to each parent. 
• Drop-Off and Pick-Up Details: Specify times and locations to avoid last-minute confusion. 
• Rotating or Fixed Schedule: Decide whether holidays will rotate annually or remain fixed (e.g., one parent always gets Christmas morning). 
• Special Traditions: Consider integrating cherished traditions from both sides into the plan. 

The more details you include, the less room for misunderstandings. 

Winter Breaks: How to Split School Vacations 

Winter breaks from school are often longer than regular holidays, which can present unique planning challenges. There are several ways to approach splitting this time. 

1. Equal Division of Time: Split the winter break down the middle, so each parent has an equal number of days. For instance, one parent takes the first week while the other takes the second week. 
2. Alternating Years: One parent has the entire winter break in even years, while the other gets it in odd years. 
3. Specific Holiday Splits: Divide the break so both parents share important days like Christmas and New Year’s equally. 

Discuss which arrangement feels fairest and aligns with your children’s needs. 

Who Gets the Major Holidays? (Christmas, Thanksgiving, New Year’s) 

The big question for many co-parents is who gets which major holidays. To avoid conflicts, establish a rotation or fixed schedule for these significant days. 

• Alternating Holidays: One parent gets Christmas Day this year, while the other gets it next year. Alternate other major holidays the same way. 
• Split Holidays: One parent gets Christmas Eve, and the other gets Christmas morning. This allows both parents to create special holiday moments. 
• Fixed Holidays: Some parents prefer fixed arrangements, such as one parent always celebrating Thanksgiving while the other always celebrates New Year’s. 

What If You’re Planning a Holiday Vacation? 

If you or your co-parent plan to travel with your children during the holidays, it’s essential to include these details in your parenting plan. Agree on destination types, the length of trips, and protocols for international or out-of-state travel. 

Advance notice is key here. By giving your co-parent ample time to review travel plans, you can minimize disagreements and ensure any necessary adjustments to the regular schedule are made. 

Pros and Cons of Splitting Holidays 

Dividing holidays has its benefits, but it’s important to recognize potential drawbacks, as well. 

Pros: 

• Allows both parents to create meaningful traditions with their children. 
• Gives each parent dedicated time to celebrate. 
• Reduces last-minute conflicts by setting expectations in advance. 

Cons: 

• May feel emotionally difficult for parents who miss spending special holidays with their children. 
• Can be challenging to transport children between homes, especially if parents live far apart. 
• Risk of unintentionally disrupting cherished traditions. 

Balance and flexibility are essential for navigating these trade-offs effectively. 

Tips for Making the Process Easier 

While drafting a holiday parenting plan isn’t always easy, these tips can help make the process smoother and more collaborative. 

1. Communicate Early: Start discussing holiday arrangements well before the season begins. This reduces stress and gives both parents time to plan. 
2. Focus on the Kids: Always prioritize what’s best for your children. Their happiness and stability should be the guiding principle. 
3. Be Flexible: Life happens, and plans may need to evolve. Approach changes with an open mind and a willingness to compromise. 
4. Stick to the Plan: Once the plan is finalized, honor your commitments to ensure a conflict-free holiday season. 

How to Handle Disagreements 

Disagreements about holiday plans can happen, even with the best intentions. If you and your co-parent can’t reach an agreement, consider using a mediator or consulting with a family law attorney to resolve disputes. 

It’s better to address conflicts early, rather than at the last minute when emotions run high. 

When to Revise Your Holiday Plan 

Families change, so it’s only natural that your holiday parenting plan may need adjustments over time. Life events like remarriages, moves, or changes in your children’s preferences might require you to revisit the plan. 

Make it a practice to review your holiday arrangements annually. This ensures the plan remains fair, effective, and centered around your children’s needs. 

Need Help Legal Help With Your Parenting Plan? 

Creating a fair and effective holiday parenting plan can feel overwhelming, but you don’t have to figure it all out alone. At The Peterson Law Firm, we’re here to help co-parents design plans that prioritize their children while minimizing conflict. 

Whether you need assistance drafting a new plan or modifying an existing agreement, our family law attorneys are just a call away. 

Contact us today to schedule a consultation and take the stress out of your co-parenting holiday planning because happy holidays start with a solid plan.